Our Love

As someone who lives in  a state of pain 24 hours a day, when ever you pile on another ailment, it always adds to my personal and unending discomfort.
In this case, it's bronchitis.  Well, I think now, it's down a level or two to just a head cold.  Maybe it's a chest cold.  But, it actually feels like both. 

So, my feet and legs are quite bothersome and I can't lay down at night without coughing and "wretching around" - as John likes to call it - all night long.  First I'm hot, there goes the blanket.  Then, I start to shiver, back underneath my blanket.  All night, coughing, switching positions, sneezing... And since I'm this sick - my blood sugars are WAY out of control.  So, I'm also up a lot due to that. 

sigh...

Last night, I got maybe - maybe - an hour's worth of sleep last night.  Scratch that.  Wait, it was less than an hour.  I turned on my Coast to Coast AM radio station, which shuts itself off after an hour.  And when I finally did doze off, I woke back up, listening to the same station....

Then, I turned on the TV.  I was trying to look for anything that might interest me.   But, in the wee hours of the morning, TV sucks ass.  So, I went out to the kitchen, grabbed my awesome new cell phone, a pair of headphones, crawled back into bed and started watching Netflix.  I ended up watching "Pretty in Pink" with Molly Ringwald.  Good movie.  Great 80's music.  I thought for sure, I'd start getting sleepy. 
Instead...

I couldn't stop thinking.  Thinking of Olivia and her new school year. Hoping for a good year, void of homework fights and groundings...  Thinking of John and our upcoming short camping trip.  And then thinking of all of our shared dreams.  All of our moments of romance, laughter, and yes - even rage.

Which brings me to what I'm trying to say.

John is my soul mate.  I knew we were made for each other.  We were meant to be together.  Forever.  Even when we were younger and my parents forbid it, we still snuck around to just be with one another.  Even after my folks took him to court because he was an adult and I wasn't, we still fought tooth and nail to be together. 
There was absolutely nothing anyone could do or say or even preach to keep us apart from each other. 
We are in love and there will never be anyone else for us than.................... us.

So, last night... awake and definitely not sleeping.  I thought. 
I thought of John's senior prom.  I thought about how at 15, I was one lucky girl.  Getting ready to accompany my boyfriend to his senior prom.  When I got ready, I had all sorts of thoughts and expectations of what the evening might hold.
I put on my dress, my high heels, and did my hair and make up and waited for John to come pick me up...
When I laid my eyes on him walking up my sidewalk, I remember how he literally took my breath away.  There's my laid back John, always donning a sweatshirt and jeans... But, there he is... handsome as the freakin' devil in tuxedo....

We stood around and "said cheese" a million times for the parents. 

Then, it was time to finally make our way to the hotel where the prom was.  Up by the Berkshire Mall.  The Inn at Reading. 
It was beautiful.  That was the first time we danced a slow dance together. 
Songs like "Lady in Red" and "You Look Wonderful Tonight"  and even "Don't Dream it's Over" still bring me instantly back to that perfect evening with John....
The way we danced was perfect.
And it wasn't awkward.  We weren't straining to keep up the rhythm.  We just fit. 
And we've fit in every other way too since that evening...
There's not a day that goes by that I don't at least have a tiny thought of that perfect evening together.  It was (up until then anyway) the most romantic night of my life...

So, this morning, as I heard John climb out of bed, pour his coffee, and then sit down with me, I couldn't help but just be thankful that I have such a good, such a caring, such a romantic man to share my life with...

John is my whole world. 

Sometimes, when I talk about joining a Bible study or eating out with a girlfriend, John will remind me to talk badly about him.  Other women want to complain about their husbands, and will get annoyed if I have nothing bad to say about mine.

But, that's how it is with John.  He's really close to perfection.  There's just something about him that has embedded itself in my head and into my heart and soul. 

I could not have asked for a better man.  I really love my man. 
And I intend to stay here at home and get better so we can go on our little camping adventure this weekend. 
A tsunami won't stop me from canoeing down the river and beaching the canoe at the island of our choice, setting up a little campfire and just enjoying each other.... 

so, I guess that's it for now....
I'm sick.  And I'm in pain. 
But, I have a man with me in my life to make it a little more bearable. 
He's here to make my soup.  Hold my hair for me if I start to vomit.  Here to tuck me into bed and wash my hair for me if it hurts to bad to stand....
I love my John... so much...

And it's a complete love. 

Because he loves me too....